What Could Have Been My Last April Fool's Day


I still remember the April Fool's Day when I was almost killed.

My mom and I were in the basement that morning as she insisted that I accompany her to rip a zipper out of an old piece of clothing, hurrying to do so before my school but arrived to cart me away.  (A recycler before it was even fashionable.)  Mom had knife in-hand to accomplish this task.

Knowing how terrified mom was of mice, and being the snotty teen that I was, I became inspired---and excitedly cried out "Mouse!" while immediately jumping up on a nearby, small stool.  My 4'10" mom shoved me off the stool in a nano-second so SHE could get on it, all the while scanning the basement floor frantically for the rodent.  

At that moment, I giddily announced "April Fool's!"

Her head jolted towards me,  black, angry eyes met mine and she shook the HUGE butcher knife right at me and stated that in no uncertain terms I  was NOT in the least bit funny!  She turned on her heel and stomped up the basement steps, steam whistling out her ears!

And there I stood, silently laughing hysterically, lest she hear me and come back to finish the job with that big ol' knife, realizing that I had almost gotten fileted in our cold basement on that April morning!

It was on that fateful morn that I realized that timing is everything!